A girl recently went to the Benefits Agency to claim Child Benefit. The clerk on duty commenced the formality of questioning her entitlement.

‘How many children do you have?’

‘Ten’ said the girl.

‘Ten?’ asks the clerk incredulously. ‘What are their names?’

‘Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne and Wayne’ replies the girl.

‘Isn’t that confusing’ comments the clerk.

‘Naa’ says the girl. ‘It’s great cos’ if they’m out playin’in the ‘oss road I just ‘ave ter shout Wa-ay-ay-ne…. yer dinners ready, or Waaayne.. goo to bed now’ and they all do it’.

‘But what if you want to attract the attention of one individually?’ asks the puzzled clerk.

‘No problem’ says the girl, ‘I just use their surnames!’

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